you say I'm this
and say I'm that
perhaps too loud
too quiet
too proud
devouring space
or in your face
stealing your song
telling your story
or staying too long
I feel manipulated
man handled and baited
someone else is always to blame
are you bored?
now you expect me to play your game
You've come across a diary of sorts. They are my thoughts and feelings given space. I come here to give of myself in full expression, and remain in a living prayer that I may always remember my relationship and Oneness to all of Life.
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Memories of a Distant Lover
I met you in a dream months ago. Never thinking we would actually fall into each others arms, never imagining you would appear in the flesh.
In the dreamtime, you were simply a picture, a development in my experience. But there you were, in reality, my Arabian savior. You were standing in front of me, all senses engulfed, the world spinning out of control, with heart on sleeve.
I found you in the corner of a crowded room among so many strangers. You turned, said hello, shook my hand, and instantly I took to you and you to me. Without hesitation we whispered truths of the deepest kind, we delved into the mysteries of life, love, nature, spirit. Words poured from our lips like the sweetest wine. We lost ourselves in the abyss of our infinite gaze.
In you, I found both a friend and companion. I was fixated and captured, watching you like a bird perched on a tree. We found ourselves celebrating, dancing away the hours, and from the edge of the dance floor I saw how free you were. You were fearless. Your smile permeated everything you looked at. You were beautiful, graceful, and I... grateful.
In the dreamtime, you were simply a picture, a development in my experience. But there you were, in reality, my Arabian savior. You were standing in front of me, all senses engulfed, the world spinning out of control, with heart on sleeve.
I found you in the corner of a crowded room among so many strangers. You turned, said hello, shook my hand, and instantly I took to you and you to me. Without hesitation we whispered truths of the deepest kind, we delved into the mysteries of life, love, nature, spirit. Words poured from our lips like the sweetest wine. We lost ourselves in the abyss of our infinite gaze.
In you, I found both a friend and companion. I was fixated and captured, watching you like a bird perched on a tree. We found ourselves celebrating, dancing away the hours, and from the edge of the dance floor I saw how free you were. You were fearless. Your smile permeated everything you looked at. You were beautiful, graceful, and I... grateful.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
A Waking Dream Into Sufficiency
he woke
with a dream
still lingering
fingering through
itching his tongue
and all he tasted
was the hatred
his mind created
and the weighted
anchor on his back
where he carried the lack
packing the guilt
for being built
so "deficient"
so "insufficient"
...
but he woke
this time anew
and he knew
fortune gazed
and cleared his haze
as he tripped
on the cord
of his discord
that detested
so invested
in thoughts infested
in the lack
of itself
of his "self"
...
and from the shelf
he seized all novels
of his strife
and with a knife
engraved it
with new life
and it was freed
from its binding
and so it shook
from this book
all the lies
all the ties
and wasted time
he spent believing
in that paradigm
no longer serving
or deserving
his mind's inventions
or toxic intentions
...
he knew this needed no further attention
with a dream
still lingering
fingering through
itching his tongue
and all he tasted
was the hatred
his mind created
and the weighted
anchor on his back
where he carried the lack
packing the guilt
for being built
so "deficient"
so "insufficient"
...
but he woke
this time anew
and he knew
fortune gazed
and cleared his haze
as he tripped
on the cord
of his discord
that detested
so invested
in thoughts infested
in the lack
of itself
of his "self"
...
and from the shelf
he seized all novels
of his strife
and with a knife
engraved it
with new life
and it was freed
from its binding
and so it shook
from this book
all the lies
all the ties
and wasted time
he spent believing
in that paradigm
no longer serving
or deserving
his mind's inventions
or toxic intentions
...
he knew this needed no further attention